A year ago today, my husband left a steady job, with insurance and a 401 K. He had no plan, and no prospects. We were scared, and also a little giddy. Scared because we had no other source of income (and we have a mortgage and 5 kids to support). Giddy because we were confident that God was leading us, so we assumed an amazing opportunity was right around the corner.
Erik felt that it would be like the Israelites crossing the Jordan river to enter the Promised Land. When they crossed the river was at flood stage, and unlike the Red Sea, it didn’t part until they stepped in. He was sure that once we took this step of faith, the waters would part for us and there would be a clear path to…somewhere.
My heart is tender this evening because, honestly, this isn’t the blog post I wanted to write. I wanted to be writing a dispatch from the Promised Land. I wanted to be able to say, “Take that step of faith that you’ve been afraid to take. I’m living proof that God will come through for you in ways you can’t even imagine yet.”
But the truth is, I haven’t “arrived” at anything definitive. The river is still at flood stage. The water still hasn’t parted.
This year hasn’t been the year I had hoped for. I don’t have a dramatic story of how God parted the waters for us with some “dream job” offer the day Erik gave his notice. But I do have a different, maybe equally miraculous story to tell: Daily promptings. “Little” opportunities. Volunteering. Retraining. Unexpected provision. Odd jobs. Even though we still have no steady income and no clear path forward, we are not drowning. All of our bills have been paid on time, and we still have money in the bank.
We’ve applied for jobs. We’ve prayed and fasted. But the bottom line is, this year wasn’t about us making a “smart decision” and having it pay off right away. What we did was Stupid.
It was also totally Safe. Because this year has been about God being 100% faithful and coming through for us in ways we couldn’t imagine a year ago. Not once. Not twice. Hundreds of times.
What about you? Maybe you believe, but you’re not ready to risk it. Maybe you want something more, but you’re scared to really trust. I’m not saying you have to do anything as stupid as what we we did, but there is a step of faith for you to take. It feels authentic and brave and scary. What is it? I’d love to hear about it in the comment section below.
I can’t call to you from the “Promised Land” and give you any guarantees. I’m still in the river. All I can say is:
Come on in, the water’s fine.